He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
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