My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
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