Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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