All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize