The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize