why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
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He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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