She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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