let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
please don't ironically join a cult
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