I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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