hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize