"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
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