We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
