Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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