That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
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