im drinking this country out of the recession.
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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