shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
he had hair everywhere except his balls
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Randomize
