Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Randomize
