distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Randomize