Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize