There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
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