I didn't shave. On purpose
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
