this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
i drank out of a bidet.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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