Plan B is the new Plan A
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
