It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I was not drunk enough for that final.
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