I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Randomize
