Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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