Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize