I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
There r osticjed everywhere
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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