Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Randomize
