I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
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