just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
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