I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize