I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize