So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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