I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Randomize
