WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize
