She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week š
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
And he claims I gave him āfuck meā eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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