he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Randomize
