theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
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