it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
