Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Randomize
