these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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