Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
