I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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