so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize