your thong is hanging out like whoa
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Randomize