his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Randomize
