Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize