hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Hippo gnu deer
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize
