Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
