I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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