so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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